Primus Sucks In Seattle (Part One)
"Sorry", said the guy wretching into the trash can to the beer lady behind the counter of the portable beer cart. He had calmly walked over to the plastic grey barrel and let it all go as quietly as possible.
But I've started this tale in the middle. Let's go back to the beginning.
My wife Mary and I made plans back in April to visit her sister up in Oregon in June. Two nephews would be graduating from high school and a niece from the University of Oregon. Since Mary is godmother to the girl and one of the boys, we saw this as a pretty important trip. After securing the time off from work, we settled into the thought of another relaxing visit in Salem. Salem's a cool city; I always visit the local independent record store and the huge used book store. (This trip's booty: two Morcheeba CDs, a Deep Purple and two Steve Winwood discs for $3 apiece, and a Lucinda Williams bootleg DVD) But Mary mentioned that her sister's family wouldn't have the week off of work and would further be busy getting ready for the graduations, so we could take off by ourselves for a few days.
I'm a city mouse, so Portland came to mind immediately. It's only an hour from Salem and we'd enjoyed our brief visits in the past. Mary said that maybe we should head up to Seattle instead. We'd never been and there's plenty to do up there. I agreed and we decided that we would drive the four hours from Salem to Seattle on Tuesday, June 1st and stay two nights. We most certainly wanted to check out a Mariners game up at Safeco, do the Space Needle, and check out the Experience Music Project museum. I started getting excited; I think it was about an hour after we'd made our decision when I jumped on the computer (or as Mary refers to it, "the Mistress") to see what was happening in Seattle on June 1st and 2nd. I checked the Mariners schedule and we were in luck as they were to play Toronto that night. Cool, there's Tuesday, I thought. So now we had Wednesday night to play around with. I couldn't control myself for long. I headed over to POLLSTAR.COM as I'm wont to do when preparing to travel and punched up Seattle and 06/02/04 . Here's a transcript of my thoughts as I went down the short list of bands playing that night in the Emerald City:
"Okay, let's see here.......hmmm......never heard of them, they're awful, local band, local band, boring, don't know them...
Then I saw the name and in my best Homer Simpson:
"Oooo! Primus! Aw, but Mary won't go for that. She hates Primus. Not as much as she hates the Grateful Dead, but hate is still the operative word here."
But it was too late for me. I would have to ask Mary if we could go to see Primus. I was going to fixate on this until I got an answer. Just knowing that there was a cool show in town would drive me up the wall if I were somewhere across town that night, no matter how great a time we'd be having. I tend to do that. I'll give you an example of what went through my mind that night after seeing the Seattle date on the web:
"PrimusPrimusPrimusPrimusPrimusPrimusPrimusSeattlePrimus".
Now, I thought, how to ask? I've gotta hit this one just right. I've got a very cool wife. She's been to some great shows with me that she normally wouldn't see of her own volition, like Tool (three times!), Red Hot Chili Peppers and even Tom Jones. Yeah, I know; God help me, I like Tom Jones. Anyway, she's always enjoyed these shows on some level, but she's also seen Primus twice in the opening band slot, once for Rush and once for Living Colour. No dice either time. I think her comment to me after I excitedly asked her what she thought when Primus finished their set before Rush came on was, "They're shit".
So if I had a few strikes against my chances of seeing Primus in Seattle, I may have had one swing left. Mary and I had once seen a Gov't Mule show in San Francisco where Les Claypool, Primus' lead singer and badass bass player, sat in and played the first set. Mary likes the Mule almost as much as I do, so when Les provided the thump on the bass necessary to quench her thirst for the rumble, she was duly impressed and even started seeing Primus in a different light. It was a most narrow sliver of light, but it was my chance to swing for the fences.
I approached her while she was making dinner in the kitchen. I felt like I was 16 again, asking my parents for the keys to the car. I think I said something like, "Um, hey Honey?" She barely looked up from all the pots and pans and replied with, "Yeah, what?" Ooo, not the best time maybe, I thought. But I forged ahead. "Hey, uh, how do you feel about seeing a band on the second night up in Seattle?" She looked up for a moment, "Sounds alright. Who's playing?", she asked. "Well", I started, "it's a band you've seen before..." and before I could finish, I felt a sheepish grin fighting its way from behind my lips. I was actually a little embarrassed. Mary's eyes lit up a little; "King's X?"
"No, I couldn't get that lucky", I told her. "But they are a trio. And you kinda like the bass player. And they're...."
Her face crinkled up like she smelled something rotten and said, "Not Primus".
Crap.
Next up: Primus Sucks In Seattle (Part Two)
But I've started this tale in the middle. Let's go back to the beginning.
My wife Mary and I made plans back in April to visit her sister up in Oregon in June. Two nephews would be graduating from high school and a niece from the University of Oregon. Since Mary is godmother to the girl and one of the boys, we saw this as a pretty important trip. After securing the time off from work, we settled into the thought of another relaxing visit in Salem. Salem's a cool city; I always visit the local independent record store and the huge used book store. (This trip's booty: two Morcheeba CDs, a Deep Purple and two Steve Winwood discs for $3 apiece, and a Lucinda Williams bootleg DVD) But Mary mentioned that her sister's family wouldn't have the week off of work and would further be busy getting ready for the graduations, so we could take off by ourselves for a few days.
I'm a city mouse, so Portland came to mind immediately. It's only an hour from Salem and we'd enjoyed our brief visits in the past. Mary said that maybe we should head up to Seattle instead. We'd never been and there's plenty to do up there. I agreed and we decided that we would drive the four hours from Salem to Seattle on Tuesday, June 1st and stay two nights. We most certainly wanted to check out a Mariners game up at Safeco, do the Space Needle, and check out the Experience Music Project museum. I started getting excited; I think it was about an hour after we'd made our decision when I jumped on the computer (or as Mary refers to it, "the Mistress") to see what was happening in Seattle on June 1st and 2nd. I checked the Mariners schedule and we were in luck as they were to play Toronto that night. Cool, there's Tuesday, I thought. So now we had Wednesday night to play around with. I couldn't control myself for long. I headed over to POLLSTAR.COM as I'm wont to do when preparing to travel and punched up Seattle and 06/02/04 . Here's a transcript of my thoughts as I went down the short list of bands playing that night in the Emerald City:
"Okay, let's see here.......hmmm......never heard of them, they're awful, local band, local band, boring, don't know them...
Then I saw the name and in my best Homer Simpson:
"Oooo! Primus! Aw, but Mary won't go for that. She hates Primus. Not as much as she hates the Grateful Dead, but hate is still the operative word here."
But it was too late for me. I would have to ask Mary if we could go to see Primus. I was going to fixate on this until I got an answer. Just knowing that there was a cool show in town would drive me up the wall if I were somewhere across town that night, no matter how great a time we'd be having. I tend to do that. I'll give you an example of what went through my mind that night after seeing the Seattle date on the web:
"PrimusPrimusPrimusPrimusPrimusPrimusPrimusSeattlePrimus".
Now, I thought, how to ask? I've gotta hit this one just right. I've got a very cool wife. She's been to some great shows with me that she normally wouldn't see of her own volition, like Tool (three times!), Red Hot Chili Peppers and even Tom Jones. Yeah, I know; God help me, I like Tom Jones. Anyway, she's always enjoyed these shows on some level, but she's also seen Primus twice in the opening band slot, once for Rush and once for Living Colour. No dice either time. I think her comment to me after I excitedly asked her what she thought when Primus finished their set before Rush came on was, "They're shit".
So if I had a few strikes against my chances of seeing Primus in Seattle, I may have had one swing left. Mary and I had once seen a Gov't Mule show in San Francisco where Les Claypool, Primus' lead singer and badass bass player, sat in and played the first set. Mary likes the Mule almost as much as I do, so when Les provided the thump on the bass necessary to quench her thirst for the rumble, she was duly impressed and even started seeing Primus in a different light. It was a most narrow sliver of light, but it was my chance to swing for the fences.
I approached her while she was making dinner in the kitchen. I felt like I was 16 again, asking my parents for the keys to the car. I think I said something like, "Um, hey Honey?" She barely looked up from all the pots and pans and replied with, "Yeah, what?" Ooo, not the best time maybe, I thought. But I forged ahead. "Hey, uh, how do you feel about seeing a band on the second night up in Seattle?" She looked up for a moment, "Sounds alright. Who's playing?", she asked. "Well", I started, "it's a band you've seen before..." and before I could finish, I felt a sheepish grin fighting its way from behind my lips. I was actually a little embarrassed. Mary's eyes lit up a little; "King's X?"
"No, I couldn't get that lucky", I told her. "But they are a trio. And you kinda like the bass player. And they're...."
Her face crinkled up like she smelled something rotten and said, "Not Primus".
Crap.
Next up: Primus Sucks In Seattle (Part Two)
posted by Tony at 6:36 PM
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